IM OK
Finally 2008 is HERE! I rang in the new year with great friends and my sis, so I had a great time though I did not plan to be in bed by 3am maybe that was a good thing. I spent the entire next day reflecting back on "07", all the mistakes I made, situations I shouldeve walked away from but didn't. I turned my phone off and was completely alone in my apartment, I sat legs crossed with my gingerbread latte in hand, pure silence and All I could do was smile...a week before xmas I had somewhat of an emotional breakdown, I cried for what seemed like hours and now...I'm....OK! Im no longer afraid to say NO and never again will I allow the bare minimum from anyone anymore. This year I plan on staying within my social cocoon, I feel safer that way, My heart is now shielded with such armor that Its gonna take an army to break down those walls. Im not saying thats a good thing but it seems to work for me. I can no longer crash and burn on the account of others. Its almost like an awakening , I no longer care what others think or say about my actions. And I could careless about what goes on in the lives of anyone outside my family. I have finally been pushed to the point of no return. There is only one of me and I know I'm a good person, Whoever doesn't see that, well that really sucks for them. Its MY TIME.....ITS FINALLY MY TIME!The opposite sex:
Its funny how much hurt someone can unknowingly inflict on a person, the amount of pain they can cause, while they seemingly remain untouched with no scars. Totally oblivious to their actions. I wonder if its my naivety that allows me to believe that they are infact as nonchalant and unaffected as they seem. I have however grown more than I thought I would. I feel a sense of freedom, I no longer wait for phone calls from that person,I don't wonder what he's doing...frankly I don't care. I had one of the most intellectual stimulating conversations with one of my guy friends. That let me know there is soo much more out there, It was like a breath of fresh air to talk about something other than "sports".."BET"..or "the club".
Im taking comfort in knowing that I will never be the same person twice. Mistakes will be made , but I've allowed myself to "feel" all those feelings and weather the storm...knowing this too shall pass. I walk away from everyone and everything in "07" with no regrets knowing exactly who I am.
HAPPY NEW YEAR:
Myself (with the legs out..lookin whore-a-licious), my sis and friends!
posted by MISS 215 @ 12:38 PM
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